Part 21: Pittsburgh

I still had unused travel funds on Southwest Airlines that were expiring in less than a week, so I decided to make a visit to Pennsylvania for the weekend in a last ditch effort to make use of the funds.

I got out of work around 5:30pm, and then headed to Midway Airport for an evening flight to Pittsburgh. The flight was an uneventful hour and twenty minutes. I landed, picked up my bags, picked up a rice burner, and started the drive to the east side of Pittsburgh from the airport, which is a ways west of town. I am very familiar with the Pittsburgh area. Back in 2010, my job flew me out there about a half dozen times to work an assignment. Two tunnels and forty-five minutes later, I pulled into the Holiday Inn in Monroeville and redeemed reward points for two free nights. Angel at the front desk was looking fine as hell.

I took my bags up to the room and took a quick shower. I scanned TUSCL for the nearest adult entertainment option. I was running out of time because I had lost an hour crossing time zones, and the 2am closing time was quickly bearing down. I got lost several times trying to find McKeesport, Pennsylvania. The steel town looked like it had seen better days. I finally found Beemer’s Gentlemen’s Club about midnight. I only had two hours to work with.

After paying a $5 cover, I sat at the bar and ordered an Iron City. The bartender gave me a High Life. I didn’t complain because I just needed a beer after a hard week. After killing the first beer, I asked for another Iron City. The bartender at that point realized that she gave me the wrong type of beer the first time, so the second beer (this time it was an actual Iron City) was on the house. This might have been the first time I ever got a free drink in a strip club. I went to the stage next to take in the talent. For just a dollar tip, the dancers on stage gave you a good gyno close-up. After a while, I realized that most of the dancers were either too old or too thick for me. I had narrowed down my targets to just two dancers: a mixed dancer and a thin blonde dancer.

I went for the mixed dancer who was sitting alone. She had a lot of piercings, including one in each of her cheeks. It was no surprise that her stage name was Dimples. I was feeling pretty horny, as I had worked my ass off the last two weeks and had not seen a naked woman since I was in College Park. I went back for a couple lap dances in a non-private area. They were decent. I dialed up a fifteen minute VIP room session for $90. The VIP rooms were done in little divided rooms with curtains over the entrances. I was hoping for something a little better than a standard lap dance, but there was no difference between the public area and private area in terms of service, at least with Dimples. That is when I saw the name “William” tattooed on Dimples. Obviously, she was married or in a relationship. I wish I would have noticed this earlier because over the years I have noticed dancers that have their pimp/significant other’s name tattooed on them, usually save their kink for their man, not a customer like me.

After a wasted fifteen minutes of my life, two o’clock was quickly approaching. I got another beer before last call. When closing time came, the club didn’t kick people out. They let the remaining customers loiter and finish their drinks. Heck, all of the dancers were dressed and out the front door before I was.

I was really hungry and thirsty for a non-alcoholic beverage at this point in the night. I stopped at Speedway to grab a few Cokes, Grandma’s Cookies, and a bag of Fritos Flavor Twists. I consumed my mini mart feast on the way back to the hotel to fight my buzz.

Arch: a transformer made out of the various bridges of Pittsburgh.