Part 4: New Orleans

I needed a big rebound after the previous night being a big time bust. I had to pull the ace out of my sleeve. I hit up the Penthouse Club. This place is a 7UP factory. They have strict hiring requirements. Most dancers that try to work here don't even get their foot in the door. The difference between this place and other French Quarter clubs is night and day. There is a totally different clientele and an overabundance of dancers. Whereas at most clubs you will tip with singles, it is not uncommon to tip with five, ten, and twenty dollar bills at the Penthouse Club. You better be packing at least $500 to show your face inside. Upbidding is fierce between patrons, and dancers aren't even fazed by a C-note. I first took up a position at the rail to survey the goods. The quality was off the charts compared to the other clubs in the area: girls with insane polework, perky lolitas, silicone-pumped princesses. Fuck yeah! I first sampled a table dance from a blonde stunner but felt like she was holding back some. I turned my attention to a spray-tanned blonde that I had hit it off with at the stage. For a stripper, she had exceptional conversation skills. This was a big bonus to compliment her banging body. I took her up to the private rooms for the rest of the night. Call me a pathetic loser but it was like boyfriend-girlfriend chemistry. This chick was a perfect 10 and didn't even seem fixed on the money. We actually spent alot of time together outside of the private area too. I don't think I have ever fallen for a stripper as I did with this girl. I spent every dollar in my wallet and walked out at closing time broke.

Next, I decided to hit up the bar I am a regular at in New Orleans. My friend, the bartender, told me a hotass black girl came into the bar around 5am early in the morning and started acting strange. She went into the washroom and didn't come out. A half our later, the bartender went in there to check on her. She was in there naked vomiting with one leg up on the sink. Her panties were hanging on the soap dispenser. The bar called 911. It was clear this girl was beyond drunk. After getting a few more beers, I decided to head back to the Staybridge Suites. On the 100 block of Bourbon there was an SUV parked with a guy standing outside of it acting all strange. From what I could make out, some whore was blowing someone inside the vehicle, and the guy outside the SUV was the pimp keeping lookout for the cops. I kept walking and a Dodge Magnum with spinners pulled up next to me. I was solicited by some hooker riding shotgun. I just ignored it, and the pimp and his bitch finally drove away. It was a pretty crazy night.